Orange Bitch

swirlyink:

terapsina:

Someone needs to write a fic of a battalion of superheroes randomly showing up at Sam’s doorstep because they have nowhere else to go.

“Hey Sam… so Pepper threw me out of my house and Rhodey’s on vacation in Mexico.”

“Steve has spoken much of you Son of Wil. Do you wish to do battle against my adopted brother?”

“So… show an archer these wings I’ve heard so much about.”

“HULK. HUNGRY.”

And Sam cursing Steve and Natasha in the depths of his soul because they started the trend and then told all their friends about it.

#and one day he comes home and his house has been upgraded

#banner has landscaped his backyard and made him a yoga spot with a fountain

#black widow and hawkeye have repainted his house (and he actually likes it)

#and tony makes sure he has free cable for life#he doesn’t mind being their safe house after that (x)